Argument with wife, need some opinions

[Sgt. Ram]

Ok, I will lay out the scenario for you. My wife and I are at church, Easter day. We are ushers for service that day. Two other men usher with us. It is very crowded that day and all the people make it feel warmer. At the end of service my wife says to one of the other men ushers, "I might pass out and you will have to give me CPR (she is smiling while saying this to him)..the man looks at me and then looks at her , then my wife says.."I said you and not him(meaning me) because he does not know CPR." then the subject was dropped and we left church. I told my wife it was inappropriate comment and could be taken as a come on. She said it wasn't. Tell me your honest opinion because of course now I am in the doghouse.lol.

 

[-X-]

I don't think you're in the wrong. It could be construed as inappropriate, and it would probably piss me off a little if my wife did that too. Doesn't matter if you don't know CPR. You're still the protector, yeah? YOU can always summon someone to help.

Be thankful we don't have very many (2) women on this board, because you'd be screwed no matter what. :lol:

 

[HeiseNBerg]

Ok, I will lay out the scenario for you. My wife and I are at church, Easter day. We are ushers for service that day. Two other men usher with us. It is very crowded that day and all the people make it feel warmer. At the end of service my wife says to one of the other men ushers, "I might pass out and you will have to give me CPR (she is smiling while saying this to him)..the man looks at me and then looks at her , then my wife says.."I said you and not him(meaning me) because he does not know CPR." then the subject was dropped and we left church. I told my wife it was inappropriate comment and could be taken as a come on. She said it wasn't. Tell me your honest opinion because of course now I am in the doghouse.lol.

Really simple way to solve this -- next time you and your wife are out to dinner, you use the same line on the waitress or hostess.

 

[Rabid Ram]

Ok, I will lay out the scenario for you. My wife and I are at church, Easter day. We are ushers for service that day. Two other men usher with us. It is very crowded that day and all the people make it feel warmer. At the end of service my wife says to one of the other men ushers, "I might pass out and you will have to give me CPR (she is smiling while saying this to him)..the man looks at me and then looks at her , then my wife says.."I said you and not him(meaning me) because he does not know CPR." then the subject was dropped and we left church. I told my wife it was inappropriate comment and could be taken as a come on. She said it wasn't. Tell me your honest opinion because of course now I am in the doghouse.lol.

Really simple way to solve this -- next time you and your wife are out to dinner, you use the same line on the waitress or hostess.

Dont use this advice unless you wanna end up on the couch because you flirted and or proved her wrong.

I full agree the comment could be misconstrued as flirting but if you trust your wife no need to let jealousy take over.

Brining up these feelings to you wife is appropriate depending on how you go about it. Simply because if she felt that way she would express it weather you wanted to hear it or not

 

[bluecoconuts]

Push her in the pool, pull her out and perform CPR, and say "now what?"

But seriously, I understand where you're coming from. Didn't really seem appropriate to me either, but the tone of her voice could change things. And like Paul said, you're the protector, for her to want to go elsewhere without you trying is a little demasculating... But.... If she's your wife, and you trust her, then you should be okay.

 

[LosAngelesRams]

Psssshhhh....

I don’t think you are in the wrong at all, no offense but how does she know that other guy knows CPR?

 

[Sgt. Ram]

Psssshhhh....

I don’t think you are in the wrong at all, no offense but how does she know that other guy knows CPR?

He is a retired police officer, so far all my buddies agree with my take on it. I am asking them to ask their wives or girlfriends and see if this is male reaction and if females take the other side.

 

[-X-]

Psssshhhh....

I don’t think you are in the wrong at all, no offense but how does she know that other guy knows CPR?

He is a retired police officer, so far all my buddies agree with my take on it. I am asking them to ask their wives or girlfriends and see if this is male reaction and if females take the other side.

Wait.

Do you two know this other dude? Is he more than a passing acquaintance?

 

[RhodyRams]

take a class together and learn CPR !!!


but IMO it was an inappropriate comment, but even if you win the argument somehow you will still lose !!

 

[Rabid Ram]

take a class together and learn CPR !!!


but IMO it was an inappropriate comment, but even if you win the argument somehow you will still lose !!

+1

 

[LosAngelesRams]

Psssshhhh....

I don’t think you are in the wrong at all, no offense but how does she know that other guy knows CPR?

He is a retired police officer, so far all my buddies agree with my take on it. I am asking them to ask their wives or girlfriends and see if this is male reaction and if females take the other side.

I'll ask my girl what she thinks about that tonight and let you know.

you got put into a awkward position, not cool. :nahhh:

 

[Sgt. Ram]

Psssshhhh....

I don’t think you are in the wrong at all, no offense but how does she know that other guy knows CPR?

He is a retired police officer, so far all my buddies agree with my take on it. I am asking them to ask their wives or girlfriends and see if this is male reaction and if females take the other side.

Wait.

Do you two know this other dude? Is he more than a passing acquaintance?

He is a member of our usher team

 

[bluecoconuts]

My girlfriend is on your side with this, she didn't think it was the right thing to say. She said it just put you down, and was unnecessary, even if she was joking.. Sounded like she was coming on to him a little bit.



Don't get into a big fight over it though, there's so many ways to go about this, but most of them probably lead to the couch. :lol:

 

[Stranger]

Ok, I will lay out the scenario for you. My wife and I are at church, Easter day. We are ushers for service that day. Two other men usher with us. It is very crowded that day and all the people make it feel warmer. At the end of service my wife says to one of the other men ushers, "I might pass out and you will have to give me CPR (she is smiling while saying this to him)..the man looks at me and then looks at her , then my wife says.."I said you and not him(meaning me) because he does not know CPR." then the subject was dropped and we left church. I told my wife it was inappropriate comment and could be taken as a come on. She said it wasn't. Tell me your honest opinion because of course now I am in the doghouse.lol.

Maybe she was flirting, maybe not. In any event, I'd interpret it as a harmless comment. Perhaps your wife was just having a little fun. She's entitled. If it was my wife, I wouldn't sweat it at all.

 

[Sgt. Ram]

Ok, I will lay out the scenario for you. My wife and I are at church, Easter day. We are ushers for service that day. Two other men usher with us. It is very crowded that day and all the people make it feel warmer. At the end of service my wife says to one of the other men ushers, "I might pass out and you will have to give me CPR (she is smiling while saying this to him)..the man looks at me and then looks at her , then my wife says.."I said you and not him(meaning me) because he does not know CPR." then the subject was dropped and we left church. I told my wife it was inappropriate comment and could be taken as a come on. She said it wasn't. Tell me your honest opinion because of course now I am in the doghouse.lol.

Maybe she was flirting, maybe not. In any event, I'd interpret it as a harmless comment. Perhaps your wife was just having a little fun. She's entitled. If it was my wife, I wouldn't sweat it at all.

I do understand that sometimes people say things before they think about what they say. My argument with my wife is that she cannot even see my point of view,she says CPR is nothing sexual, and I will agree with that if someone's life is in danger there is nothing sexual about it. But she was not light headed, she was smiling while making the statement. In a joking context and if it is not be taken as flirtation then it would have been ok for me to make the same statement to him and she should not think twice about it. But I guarantee she would have said something like "Do we need to talk?" and also if we are on vacation, say a beach resort, and there is a nurses convention taking place. They ask for volunteers for CPR trainers to be patients, and most are beautiful to ordinary looking girls , if there is nothing sexual about it, then She should not have a problem with me volunteering. On day two of the cold shoulder and I feel she could at least try to see it from my side.

 

[Selassie I]

Sgt,,, I'm gonna bite my tongue on this one. However, I will share this with you Brudda.

Sometimes I show my wife some of the topics here. This was not one of them, but she was in the office with me and she noticed the thread title... she couldn't help but want to check this out. I'll keep it short. She was like, tell that guy's wife she needs to listen to Anuhea's new song.


[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3w997ItazEs[/youtube]


I hope this is only taken in a positive way btw. My wife was not being mean when she suggested this.

 

[Ramhusker]

Man, I can understand how this situation did not sit well with you but let it go and let it go now. I'd never mention it again to your wife. You know women and men are wired differently and for some reason are designed to have opposing views on most things which usually escalate to conflict. That's where further conversation on this subject with your wife will go. Your brothers here have amply explained how most people would perceive your experience and you know how you feel. It probably was just a poor attempt at humor by your wife and nothing more. If not, then at least your eyes are wide open now.

If you still feel you need some vindication, go take a CPR class without her knowing, frame the certificate, hang it on a prominent wall in your house and never say a word. That will let her know that her failed attempt at humor struck a hurtful nerve and you took action to improve your abilities as a protector of the den.

 

[-X-]

Man, I can understand how this situation did not sit well with you but let it go and let it go now. I'd never mention it again to your wife. You know women and men are wired differently and for some reason are designed to have opposing views on most things which usually escalate to conflict. That's where further conversation on this subject with your wife will go. Your brothers here have amply explained how most people would perceive your experience and you know how you feel. It probably was just a poor attempt at humor by your wife and nothing more. If not, then at least your eyes are wide open now.

If you still feel you need some vindication, go take a CPR class without her knowing, frame the certificate, hang it on a prominent wall in your house and never say a word. That will let her know that her failed attempt at humor struck a hurtful nerve and you took action to improve your abilities as a protector of the den.

That's solid advice right there.

Do exactly that.

 

[Stranger]

yeah, let it go.

 

[Sgt. Ram]

Man, I can understand how this situation did not sit well with you but let it go and let it go now. I'd never mention it again to your wife. You know women and men are wired differently and for some reason are designed to have opposing views on most things which usually escalate to conflict. That's where further conversation on this subject with your wife will go. Your brothers here have amply explained how most people would perceive your experience and you know how you feel. It probably was just a poor attempt at humor by your wife and nothing more. If not, then at least your eyes are wide open now.

If you still feel you need some vindication, go take a CPR class without her knowing, frame the certificate, hang it on a prominent wall in your house and never say a word. That will let her know that her failed attempt at humor struck a hurtful nerve and you took action to improve your abilities as a protector of the den.

Thanks, great advice. Thanks to everyone point of view. I will let it go,but my wife acting so pissed about it, makes it very hard when I feel I was right about it. But anyway, I will let it go..she will calm down eventually, she is a red head after all. Lol. :lol: