LEGEND Make Us Laugh

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RocknRam29

Live, Love, Laugh, & Learn
Joined
Oct 2, 2011
Messages
2,018
71209940_10217813923451008_4413964712169963520_n.jpg
 

Selassie I

H. I. M.
Moderator
Joined
Jun 23, 2010
Messages
18,230
Name
Haole
Text Message Chain...


Girlfriend-
Baby, you're embarrassing me! I brought you over here to meet my parents for the 1st time and you haven't said one word to them. WHY???

Me- I bought condoms at the store earlier and proudly told the cashier I was going to get lucky tonight.

Girlfriend- Okay?

Me- I high-fived all the people standing in line behind me as I left the store. They were all laughing and cheering me on.

Girlfriend- SO ????

Me- The people cheering me on the loudest... they were your parents.
 

Elmgrovegnome

Legend
Joined
Jan 23, 2013
Messages
22,796
A 65-year-old man walked into a crowded waiting room and approached the desk.

The Receptionist said, 'Yes sir, what are you seeing the Doctor for today?'

'There's something wrong with my dick', he replied.

The receptionist became irritated and said, 'You shouldn't come into a crowded waiting room and say things like that. '

'Why not, you asked me what was wrong and I told you,' he said.

The Receptionist replied; 'Now you've caused some embarrassment in this room full of people. You should have said there is something wrong with your ear or something and discussed the problem further with the Doctor in private.'

The man replied, 'You shouldn't ask people questions in a roomful of strangers, if the answer could embarrass anyone. The man walked out, waited several minutes, and then re-entered.

The Receptionist smiled smugly and asked, 'Yes??'

'There's something wrong with my ear,' he stated.

The Receptionist nodded approvingly and smiled, knowing he had taken her advice.. 'And what is wrong with your ear, Sir?'

'I can't piss out of it,' he replied.