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Weird feeling

Discussion in 'OFF TOPIC' started by brokeu91, May 16, 2014.

  1. brokeu91

    brokeu91 Well-Known Member

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    I just feel like sharing something with my Rams brothers, because I need to get this off my chest

    Background: I grew up fairly poor. I lived in a working class neighborhood. My friends and family all were from the same type of place. Our family was on welfare, but we got by. My parents always fought, right in front of me and my brother, especially about money. I remember always being anxious that my family would be kicked out of our house and our family would break up. It probably motivated me quite a bit actually.

    Through years of toiling, of being disadvantaged (and I can tell you how much it sucks growing up as a poor white kid), I made it. I'm a doctor. I'm now engaged to a beautiful, kind, intelligent woman (who is way beyond what I deserve) and will be married in a few months. I just bought a beautiful house, in a beautiful neighborhood. I'm still cheap as hell, but it's weird knowing that I could just suddenly buy something that I would never, ever, thought I could just buy "on a whim". I drove through my neighborhood today stunned that I live in such a place. The entire neighborhood is well manicured, beautiful, with great homes, huge plots of lands (I live on an acre plot), and without the cookie cutter houses. I am truly lucky to be in such a place.

    So why do I feel guilty? Why do I feel like an imposter? I'm a psychiatrist, I should probably know before you, I realize. I just needed to vent this and get if off my chest. I just feel like a phony, every time I drive home. Every time I see my neighbors, I can't even look them in the eye (it doesn't help that they're all stuck up bastards, I wave but they never wave back).
    #1
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