- Joined
- Jun 20, 2010
- Messages
- 35,576
- Name
- The Dude
Not *our* record. This isn't one of those threads where you're called upon to be the next Nostradamus.
I just felt like messing around. I know this will get picked apart for various reasons, but I don't care.
Now let's play <Wink Martindale voice> GUESS. THAT. RECORD!
"Our first contestant is QB A. QB A is originally from Kentucky and is the son of a farmer where he enjoyed milking cows, slinging shit out of stables, and eating maple bacon. He now lives in New Jersey with his wife and 3 children. Welcome to the show, QB A."
"These are some garbage stats you had, QB A. How did you manage to be so horrible?"
"Well, Wink, I just gave 110% and trusted in my teammates, and you know, football is a team sp..."
"Yeah, that's great. Thanks. On to our next contestant."
----------------------------------------------
"Our second contestant is RB A RB A is originally from Fort Bragg North Carolina."
"Coincidentally, RB A played football with QB A during the same season, and currently lives in New Jersey with his wife and two kids."
"Welcome to the show, RB A. Those are some nice numbers you had that year, despite QB A's efforts."
"Thanks Wink. You know, Frankenstein never scared me. But marsupials do. Cuz they're fast."
"Well, uh, <nervous chuckle> thank you, RB A. We're looking forward to your next random outburst."
"I like bisgetti."
"Right. Let's move on, we have a big show ahead."
----------------------------------------------
"In the audience we have QB A's wide receivers. Let's welcome them to the show."
"Judging from your stats, I assume only one of you could afford the tickets to get in here? <Canned audience laughter>"
"Now let's take a look at the big board here, contestants."
"RB A? Over here, RB A <snaps fingers>. Hey! <whistles>"
"Sorry, Wink, I tawt I taw a putty tat."
"Wow. Okay, let's everyone take a look <glares at RB A> OVER HERE at the defensive statistics from that year."
Ready?
<audience, in unison>, "GUESS. THAT. RECORD!"
_______________________________
But wait. Bonus round.
Same year. QB on team Y. Why Y? Why not.
RB on Team Y.
Receivers...
And defense.
"GUESS. THAT. RECORD!" ________________
And the impatient, tl;dr crowd can skip to the spoiler here.
I just felt like messing around. I know this will get picked apart for various reasons, but I don't care.
Now let's play <Wink Martindale voice> GUESS. THAT. RECORD!
"Our first contestant is QB A. QB A is originally from Kentucky and is the son of a farmer where he enjoyed milking cows, slinging shit out of stables, and eating maple bacon. He now lives in New Jersey with his wife and 3 children. Welcome to the show, QB A."
"These are some garbage stats you had, QB A. How did you manage to be so horrible?"
"Well, Wink, I just gave 110% and trusted in my teammates, and you know, football is a team sp..."
"Yeah, that's great. Thanks. On to our next contestant."
----------------------------------------------
"Our second contestant is RB A RB A is originally from Fort Bragg North Carolina."
"Coincidentally, RB A played football with QB A during the same season, and currently lives in New Jersey with his wife and two kids."
"Welcome to the show, RB A. Those are some nice numbers you had that year, despite QB A's efforts."
"Thanks Wink. You know, Frankenstein never scared me. But marsupials do. Cuz they're fast."
"Well, uh, <nervous chuckle> thank you, RB A. We're looking forward to your next random outburst."
"I like bisgetti."
"Right. Let's move on, we have a big show ahead."
----------------------------------------------
"In the audience we have QB A's wide receivers. Let's welcome them to the show."
"Judging from your stats, I assume only one of you could afford the tickets to get in here? <Canned audience laughter>"
"Now let's take a look at the big board here, contestants."
"RB A? Over here, RB A <snaps fingers>. Hey! <whistles>"
"Sorry, Wink, I tawt I taw a putty tat."
"Wow. Okay, let's everyone take a look <glares at RB A> OVER HERE at the defensive statistics from that year."
Ready?
<audience, in unison>, "GUESS. THAT. RECORD!"
_______________________________
But wait. Bonus round.
Same year. QB on team Y. Why Y? Why not.
RB on Team Y.
Receivers...
And defense.
"GUESS. THAT. RECORD!" ________________
And the impatient, tl;dr crowd can skip to the spoiler here.
Team X - 14-2, Super Bowl Champions - New York Giants, 1986.
Phil Simms, Joe Morris.
Team Y - 8-8, 3rd place Miami Dolphins, 1986.
Dan Marino, Lorenzo Hampton
Phil Simms, Joe Morris.
Team Y - 8-8, 3rd place Miami Dolphins, 1986.
Dan Marino, Lorenzo Hampton
