LEGEND Dumbass of the Day

[RedRam]

You might be a dumbass if you slap a woman who then kicks your butt. Grainy footage but still good for a giggle.
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View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2VGsIBgJK3U

Back in the day, long before camera phones unfortunately, I witnessed an epic beatdown. A couple friends and I were having a couple cold ones at a little bar in San Jose one evening after work. There's this cute, petite woman seated at the bar by herself. Some guy, who apparently had a big head start on the day's drinking, walks in and approaches the woman. After a brief conversation, the drunk guy gets pissed off and shoves the woman. We all get up to intervene but she says she's fine and she'll handle it. She gets back on her stool and starts sipping her drink again. The guy, who had walked out after the first shove, comes back and knocks this woman to the floor spilling her drink onto somebody sitting three stools away. It's on now, my friends and I were going to kick this guy's @$$ but she gets up and says she's fine, she'll handle it. She asks the drunk guy to step outside. No way we were letting her go by herself! She was probably 95-100 lbs at best. He was more than double that. Anyway, they square off outside and she, yet again, declines our help. Well, as it turned out, she could handle it on her own. She was a third degree black belt and ended up beating the absolute out of this guy!:shocked::rolllaugh::rolllaugh: After a couple of trips to the pavement, we were imploring the GUY to stay down! Nope! Too drunk and too stupid!:boxing::boxing::boxing::deadhorse::deadhorse:It was like it was a movie or something! We were thoroughly enjoying it, until the cops showed up. The cops wouldn't buy the story that this little woman beat the crap out of this guy and questioned us at length thinking that we tore this guy up! Fortunately, the only person that got hauled in was the drunk guy that took the beating. Drunk in public...:rimshot:

 

[Prime Time]

Back in the day, long before camera phones unfortunately, I witnessed an epic beatdown. A couple friends and I were having a couple cold ones at a little bar in San Jose one evening after work. There's this cute, petite woman seated at the bar by herself. Some guy, who apparently had a big head start on the day's drinking, walks in and approaches the woman. After a brief conversation, the drunk guy gets ticked off and shoves the woman. We all get up to intervene but she says she's fine and she'll handle it. She gets back on her stool and starts sipping her drink again. The guy, who had walked out after the first shove, comes back and knocks this woman to the floor spilling her drink onto somebody sitting three stools away. It's on now, my friends and I were going to kick this guy's @$$ but she gets up and says she's fine, she'll handle it. She asks the drunk guy to step outside. No way we were letting her go by herself! She was probably 95-100 lbs at best. He was more than double that. Anyway, they square off outside and she, yet again, declines our help. Well, as it turned out, she could handle it on her own. She was a third degree black belt and ended up beating the absolute out of this guy!:shocked::rolllaugh::rolllaugh: After a couple of trips to the pavement, we were imploring the GUY to stay down! Nope! Too drunk and too stupid!:boxing::boxing::boxing::deadhorse::deadhorse:It was like it was a movie or something! We were thoroughly enjoying it, until the cops showed up. The cops wouldn't buy the story that this little woman beat the crap out of this guy and questioned us at length thinking that we tore this guy up! Fortunately, the only person that got hauled in was the drunk guy that took the beating. Drunk in public...

Back in the day when I was an instructor at Milstead's Kenpo Karate(you remember him right?), I was training a female black belt named Lisa for her first fight in the ring. She wasn't more than 5' tall but squat in her build. I was wearing a protective vest and head gear. We were using 12 ounce gloves.

At some point she landed some body shots on that vest I was wearing and bruised my ribs to the point I couldn't continue because I could barely breathe. She later went on to win her fight by a knockout. This was in the early 90's before MMA. It goes to show you, never underestimate your opponent, male or female. Yikes!

 

[Memento]

My little sister is a black belt in Tae Kwon Do. She's around 5'3", 115 lbs., but she's seriously strong.

 

[RedRam]

Back in the day when I was an instructor at Milstead's Kenpo Karate(you remember him right?), I was training a female black belt named Lisa for her first fight in the ring. She wasn't more than 5' tall but squat in her build. I was wearing a protective vest and head gear. We were using 12 ounce gloves.

At some point she landed some body shots on that vest I was wearing and bruised my ribs to the point I couldn't continue because I could barely breathe. She later went on to win her fight by a knockout. This was in the early 90's before MMA. It goes to show you, never underestimate your opponent, male or female. Yikes!

I remember Milstead.

 

[Prime Time]

I remember Milstead.

I haven't communicated with him in a few years but I know he moved to LA and became an attorney. He hated doing that and was thinking of starting another studio.

https://www.youtube.com/user/MilsteadBoxingandFit

It looks like he packed on a few pounds.

 

[RedRam]

It looks like he packed on a few pounds.

I can relate. I still haven't been "released" by my Dr. to resume playing hockey. I feel fine and want to get back on the ice. It'll be great for my physical, and especially mental, health!!

 

[Prime Time]

View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Iubog28_KBI

 

[Prime Time]

Anyone can be the victim of a burglary but you might be a dumbass if you allow yourself to get burglarized 4 times during a 3 1/2-hour span by the same guy while you snore away in your bed. Get a dog. Get a security system. Lock your doors. Join a neighborhood watch. Do something, anything...
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http://www.mysanantonio.com/news/lo...ome-several-times-10983621.php?ipid=artrecirc

S.A. family sleeps as man burglarizes home 4 times in less than 4 hours, police say
By Madalyn Mendoza

A San Antonio man is accused of stealing items from a Southeast Side home four times in a 3 1/2-hour span while the homeowners and their children slept inside the residence.

He allegedly entered through a driveway door after the family of four fell asleep, then proceeded to make multiple trips in and out of the residence starting just after 11:30 p.m. All four burglaries were caught on surveillance footage, documents show.

At one point, Beltran spent at least 15 minutes ransacking the home while the family slept, according to the documents.

He allegedly stole a flat-screen television, two laptop computers, a theater system, a video game system, cellphones, a small amount of cash, a purse with two gift cards, and James Avery jewelry, the documents said.

Authorities tracked down Daniel Beltran down after locating some of the property at a local pawn shop, the documents said.

He was arrested Monday evening on burglary of a habitation charge, a second-degree felony, online records show.

 

[Prime Time]

http://www.miamiherald.com/news/local/crime/article137317553.html

Miami lawyer’s pants erupt in flames during arson trial in court
BY DAVID OVALLE

A Miami defense lawyer’s pants burst into flames Wednesday afternoon as he began his closing arguments in front of a jury — in an arson case.

Stephen Gutierrez, who was arguing that his client’s car spontaneously combusted and was not intentionally set on fire, had been fiddling in his pocket as he was about to address jurors when smoke began billowing out his right pocket, witnesses told the Miami Herald.

He rushed out of the Miami courtroom, leaving spectators stunned. After jurors were ushered out, Gutierrez returned unharmed, with a singed pocket, and insisted it wasn’t a staged defense demonstration gone wrong, observers said.

Instead, Gutierrez blamed a faulty battery in an e-cigarette, witnesses told the Miami Herald.

“It was surreal,” one observer told the Miami Herald.

Repeated calls to Gutierrez’s cellphone went unanswered. Miami-Dade police and prosecutors are now investigating the episode. Officers seized several frayed e-cigarette batteries as evidence.

“A lot of people could have been hurt,” another observer in court told the Miami Herald.

With millions of users across the country, e-cigarettes deliver vaporized nicotine through a heated liquid solution. But questions about the health and fire risks of the products have mounted, with the U.S. Department of Transportation recently banning e-cigarettes from checked bags on airplanes.

Last year, a Naples man filed suit in Miami-Dade after an e-cigarette exploded in his mouth, leaving him in a coma.

 

[Prime Time]

http://www.upi.com/Odd_News/2017/03.../?utm_source=sec&utm_campaign=sl&utm_medium=2

Cooler donated to Goodwill store contained $24,000 worth of pot
By Ben Hooper


View: https://twitter.com/MonroePolice/status/841785526491402241?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw

Police in Washington state said a cooler donated to a Goodwill store turned out to contain something far more valuable -- $24,000 worth of marijuana.

Monroe police said workers at the local Goodwill were sorting through donations during the weekend when they came across the cooler.

"This cooler was donated over the weekend to the Goodwill. Employees surprised when they opened the lid," police tweeted.

The cooler was found to contain multiple baggies containing a total 3.75 pounds of marijuana, which police estimated had a $24,000 street value.

Police are investigating and the Goodwill store is checking surveillance footage to try to identify the person who donated the cooler.

 

[LesBaker]

Police are investigating and the Goodwill store is checking surveillance footage to try to identify the person who donated the cooler.

Good grief they have nothing better to do?

 

[fearsomefour]

http://www.upi.com/Odd_News/2017/03.../?utm_source=sec&utm_campaign=sl&utm_medium=2

Cooler donated to Goodwill store contained $24,000 worth of pot
By Ben Hooper


View: https://twitter.com/MonroePolice/status/841785526491402241?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw

Police in Washington state said a cooler donated to a Goodwill store turned out to contain something far more valuable -- $24,000 worth of marijuana.

Monroe police said workers at the local Goodwill were sorting through donations during the weekend when they came across the cooler.

"This cooler was donated over the weekend to the Goodwill. Employees surprised when they opened the lid," police tweeted.

The cooler was found to contain multiple baggies containing a total 3.75 pounds of marijuana, which police estimated had a $24,000 street value.

Police are investigating and the Goodwill store is checking surveillance footage to try to identify the person who donated the cooler.

$6,400 a lb?
Jesus, not where I am.
Anyway the cooler had 10 pounds.....err, about 4 pounds o weed in it.
Pinch, pinch.

 

[Prime Time]

http://boingboing.net/2017/03/24/uk-courts-refuses-to-let-wife.html?fk_bb

UK court refuses to let wife divorce husband, tells her unhappiness is to be expected in marriage
Rob Beschizza

In Britain, grounds for divorce are quite specific: adultery, desertion, "unreasonable behavior", the agreement of both parties or five years separation.An appeals court has therefore affirmed another judge's ruling that Tini Owens, 66, is not otherwise permitted to divorce her husband of 39 years.

She said the marriage was loveless, desperately unhappy, and that she was left in a wretched state by his manner, tone, insensitivity and mistrust.

Her complaint reads like the script of a grim British cringe-humor sitcom: yelling at her in an airport after her failure to buy the right crystal tchotchke from duty free; nasty remarks during dinner with guests; endless passive-aggressive sighing and tutting, etc.

It is plain from his judgment that Judge Tolson was unimpressed by the wife’s petition. He said it “lacked beef because there was none.”
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WTH is "tchotchke" and "tutting?"

"Hanging on in quiet desperation is the English way." - Pink Floyd.

 

[Dodgersrf]

http://boingboing.net/2017/03/24/uk-courts-refuses-to-let-wife.html?fk_bb

UK court refuses to let wife divorce husband, tells her unhappiness is to be expected in marriage
Rob Beschizza

In Britain, grounds for divorce are quite specific: adultery, desertion, "unreasonable behavior", the agreement of both parties or five years separation.An appeals court has therefore affirmed another judge's ruling that Tini Owens, 66, is not otherwise permitted to divorce her husband of 39 years.

She said the marriage was loveless, desperately unhappy, and that she was left in a wretched state by his manner, tone, insensitivity and mistrust.

Her complaint reads like the script of a grim British cringe-humor sitcom: yelling at her in an airport after her failure to buy the right crystal tchotchke from duty free; nasty remarks during dinner with guests; endless passive-aggressive sighing and tutting, etc.

It is plain from his judgment that Judge Tolson was unimpressed by the wife’s petition. He said it “lacked beef because there was none.”
***********************************************************************************
WTH is "tchotchke" and "tutting?"

"Hanging on in quiet desperation is the English way." - Pink Floyd.

Wtf.
Never get married in England.

 

[FaulkSF]

[QUOTE="
WTH is "tchotchke" and "tutting?"

"Hanging on in quiet desperation is the English way." - Pink Floyd.[/QUOTE]
Tchotchkes are useless little trinkets and items that my wife buys that clutters a room.

Tutting is making a tsk sound and rolling your eyes in passive aggressive behavior.

Ex. I tutted as my wife pointed to tchochkes that she wanted to buy at Target. I later learned I would be sleeping on the couch this evening.

 

[Lunchbox]

Wtf.
Never get married in England.

Simple solution really. She just needs to commit adultery and problem solved. Of course there will probably not be an equitable property settlement coming afterwards...

 

[Prime Time]

Man tries to burglarize school but...curses foiled again.
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https://www.yahoo.com/news/man-gets...medium=website&utm_content=link&ICID=ref_fark

Man Gets 'Pantsed' by Fence While Trying to Escape During Alleged Burglary
Maya Chung

The suspect reportedly ran and tried to hop the school’s spiked fence.

He failed.

Bystander Jesse Sensibar captured a photo of the alleged crook hanging upside down with his pants down and underwear showing after his clothing had apparently gotten stuck on the fence.

"One more reason not to jump fences in baggy pants. I saw this homie hanging around at the Miles School this morning when I was rolling eastbound on Broadway Avenue," Sensibar wrote on his Facebook page. "I was going to help him off the fence but by the time I got back around the block the cops were rolling up two cars deep."

Police confirmed that they did take someone into custody in connection with the incident.

 

[Prime Time]

http://ottawacitizen.com/news/local-news/driver-with-open-beer-log-suspension-stopped-in-west-quebec

Quebec driver charged after police find suspension made from wooden logs and chicken wire
Andrew Seymour, Ottawa Citizen

Police supplied this photo of this West Quebec driver who used logs to reinforce his car's broken suspension.
MRC DES COLLINES

A driver who used wooden logs and chicken wire to reinforce his vehicle’s suspension was ticketed and had his car impounded by police following a traffic stop in west Quebec.

The MRC des Collines police said they pulled the 1999 Toyota Tercel over on Sunday at about 10:45 p.m. on route du Carrefour in Val-des-Monts after noticing the car didn’t have working brake lights.

After pulling the car over, they discovered that the 28-year-old driver had no proof of insurance and an open beer in the front seat, police said.

A closer inspection of the car also revealed that three of the four tires showed signs of advanced wear (including no tread in some spots), it was missing its windshield wipers and had a rear suspension held in place by the wooden logs.

“It was basically keeping the vehicle up,” said Sgt. Martin Fournel.

After administering a sobriety test, which the driver passed, police impounded the car so it could undergo a mechanical inspection. In addition to the towing bill, the driver was also given a $481 ticket for open alcohol. He will also be ticketed for various safety infractions and failing to have insurance documents.

 

[Force16X]

 

[Prime Time]

Meet the "Spokane Spanker" who wears a rainbow-colored bandana while on his crime spree.

http://kfor.com/2017/04/20/a-serial-spanker-is-on-the-loose-spanking-women-at-random/

A serial “spanker” is on the loose, spanking women at random
BY HEATHER HOLEMAN

SPOKANE, Washington - Some college students are warning others about a man now deemed "The Spokane Spanker."

The women are students at Gonzaga University, a Catholic school in Washington where a man on a bicycle has been reported racing by, swiftly smacking random women on the bottom.

So far, four students have reported the crime to campus security and told KHQ News, "It was really terrible and just completely shocking."

The women, who wish to remain anonymous, say they feel violated and disrespected.

One student says she was walking with her friend when the man targeted her, riding by and swatting her with such force that she bent over in pain.

And as he rode off, she says the man looked back, giving the students a look they will never forget.

"He just really clearly seemed pleased with himself, which was just really disgusting."

But it didn't end there - a few minutes later they say the man rode by again, this time slapping the other student's backside.

"Particularly creepy with that incident was just that there was no real way that he would have come up behind us again without having to, like, wait and watch for us. It was clear that he was lurking and waiting for us, which makes it particularly terrifying," she said.

GU Campus Security sent out the following warning to students, asking anyone who has been victimized by the rainbow-colored bandana-wearing "Spokane Spanker" to give police a call.

Yesterday between 2:30 PM and 4:00 PM, four GU community members reported being slapped on the buttocks while walking/jogging on either the Centennial Trail (off campus) or on the River Loop Trail (on campus). All reported that a white male on a bicycle was the offender.

He was further described as being approximately 5’10” medium build, brown hair, orange shirt and dark shorts or pants. He was wearing a backpack in two of the incidents and a rainbow bandana in another. Anyone being assaulted or witnessing a similar assault is urged to call Spokane Police immediately.

Update:

http://www.khq.com/story/35192009/w...-responsibility-for-centennial-trail-assaults

SPOKANE, Wash. -

On Wednesday, a man claiming to be the assailant showed up at KHQ in downtown Spokane.

Jonathan Smith had a prepared statement he wanted to read to his victims to show his remorse. Smith admitted to slapping dozens of women on their backsides, saying he "saw butts that he liked and slapped them."

KHQ did call police to make them aware that Smith was talking with us. Police say they are investigating and Smith himself confirmed he has already spoken with officers. Police told us Smith is a suspect and they know where to find him when they're ready to make an arrest.

In a tearful, 5-minute written statement, Smith told KHQ Local News Reporter Joe McHale why he did it, and what made him come forward today.